Cannibal Kitchen: The Return of the Living Dead

“They’re Back From The Grave And Ready To Party!”

Last Saturday I had the privilege of meeting and listening to a Q and A from the fabulous Linnea Quigley. Yep, that’s right, THEE Linnea Quigley! Oh and you bet your ass she was just as fun and adorable in person. You see, every year around this time there is a fabulous event called “The Massacre”, which plays horror movies 24 hours straight. Although not for the faint of heart, or weak in sitting (there was at least one ambulance called that night), this event is a highlight of my life year after year and all around a staple of bonding for hundreds of horror fiends in a giant sleepover type setting. This year I’m also stoked to say that a friend of mine, and resident Cannibal Kitchen giveaway artist, Andrew Klass, won for best trailer for his up and coming short, “Snuff”. Burnt weenies anyone? Have no idea what I’m talking about, oh just wait a little bit and you will see. Anyways, let’s get back on track here  with a film I can watch numerous times and still laugh like a kid (or adult/no shame) at Harry Potter camp.

The Return of the Living Dead was originally planned to be directed by Tobe Hooper, and later got handed off to Dan O’Bannon. Both men are A-ok in my book, however, it is rumored that Tobe had his mind-set on filming in 3D and because of that I am glad there ended up being a director change. Sorry world, 3D hurts my eyes….and kind of my heart. Besides O’Bannon’s lack of 3D interest, I can also respect the fact that when first handed the script he insisted on changes. In his eyes, the original script was structured too much as a “Night of the Living Dead” sequel, and he didn’t want to intrude onto Romero’s turf. For that reason, we truly have O’Bannon to thank for the humorous gem that “The Return of the Living Dead” has come to be.

This film is a glorious thrill ride from start to finish. Unlike many films of this nature, we are handed a cast of characters that are not only like-able, but remind you of people you would probably be friends with. There are no delicate Ashley’s or Todd’s, but instead we are left with a group of nihilistic punk rockers by the names of Trash, Suicide, Spider, and Scuz. We have the rare occurence of fast paced brain hungry “zombies”, and  characters who do very realistic things in an effort to defend themselves. I don’t know about you guys, but if a pick axe thru the head didn’t solve the problem, I’d probably move on to decapitation and then pyro antics as well.

Before we get onto these punk rock party tacos, let us please take a moment of silence and prayer for the beautifully poetic scene of Trash’s resurrection, prosthetic hoo ha cover and all. Ready…1….2….3…BRAINS!

Pulled Punk Tacos
As I stated in my previous update I was planning on giving some awesome twist recipes for leftovers. These Pulled Punk Tacos are a nifty alternative to a pulled pork sandwich and bring new life to a traditional delicacy. After all, tacos are a divine cuisine. In addition, many of the ingredients found in this recipe can be maneuvered to form the recipe to follow, truly completing a punk rock taco party for many taste buds.

Suicide Salsa Ingredients
 4 Medium sized Tomatoes
– 1/3 Cup Fresh Cilantro, Chopped
– 1/4 Cup Red Onion
 Juice from 1/2 Lime
 1/2 Teaspoon Minced Garlic
 Pinch of Salt and Pepper 

In a small bowl mix all ingredients. Cover and chill for 1 hour before using.

Scuz It’s Spicy Sour Cream Ingredients
 1 Large Anaheim Pepper
 1/2 Cup Plain Sour Cream
 1 Tablespoon Sriracha Sauce
 1/4 Teaspoon Chili Powder
 Pinch Cayenne Pepper

Preheat oven to 350 Degrees F. Fold the pepper in a large pice of tinfoil. Place on a baking dish or tray and cook for 1 hour. After pepper has roasted, place in a food processor and pulse until it forms a paste. In a small bowl place all ingredients. Stir until fully combined. For all you heat heads out there, make sure to taste a little and see if you would like to add more spice. If you do and your tongue agrees, just add some more sriracha sauce to your liking. Cover and chill for 1 hour before using.

Pulled Punk Taco Ingredients
Use the leftovers from this recipe or continue on as shown
– 1 (1lb) Pork Tenderloin
– 1 (15oz) Guinness Draught
– 2 Tablespoons Light Brown Sugar
– Pinch of Cumin
– Pinch of Chili Powder
– Pinch of Red Pepper Flakes
– Pinch of Salt
– Pinch of Black Pepper
– 1 Teaspoon White Wine Vinegar
– 1/2 Cup BBQ Sauce (This step is optiniol because the pork on its own, after the marinade and cook, will have a nice flavor. BBQ sauce is only needed if you want a little more bbq flavor to your pork.)
– Pepper Jack Cheese, Shredded
– Medium sized Soft Shell Tacos (Flour or Corn)

In a small crock pot, on low heat, mix together Guinness, brown sugar, seasonings, and vinegar. Add thawed out pork tenderloin and spoon liquid mixture over every part. Cover and allow to cook for 7 hours covered; occasionally rotating and re-glazing with liquid mixture. After 7 hours, carefully discard all liquid from the crock pot. With the cooked tenderloin still in the crock pot, use two forks and break the meat apart into a shredded texture. This will be very easy to do with how you have just cooked the pork. This would be the point you would add the BBQ sauce if you choose. If you do use it, after fully coating and mixing, return the lid and allow to cook for an additional hour to caramelize the sauce.

Wrap the taco shells in a couple paper towels and place them in the microwave for 20 seconds to slightly heat up and make more pliable. To assemble tacos, place a layer of pulled pork, followed by salsa, sour cream, and grated cheese.

Makes 8

Trashtastic Tacos
I’m a huge fan of potato tacos. As a matter of fact, I just destroyed two less than an hour ago. Although these were “fourth meal” status, they were just as glorious in my eyes. These tacos are simple in ingredients but not to be underestimated for they are well hung in the flavor department. You wouldn’t under estimate a simple minded Zombie now would you. Nope, because they’d sneak attack your ass in a second. Just like the tomato, salsa enriched coating on the potatoes will sneak attack your taste buds. You’ve been warned.

– 2 Large Baking Potatoes
– 1/2 Cup Yellow Onion, Diced
– 1 Large Anaheim Pepper, Diced
– 3 Tablespoons Salsa
– 2 Tablespoons Tomato Paste
– 1 Tablespoon Minced Garlic
– 1 (1/2) Teaspoon Seasoning Salt
– 1 Teaspoon Cumin
– 1 Teaspoon Sea Salt
– 1 Teaspoon Black Pepper
– 1/2 Teaspoon Chili Powder
– Cilantro, Chopped to garnish
– 1 Lime, Cut in quarters to garnish
– 2 Tablespoons Butter

Peel Potatoes and then cut into 1/2 Inch cubes. In a large skillet, heat up butter over medium heat. Add onions, garlic, and peppers and begin to saute. After 1 minute, reduce heat to low and allow to cook for 8 minutes; stirring occasionally.
Next, add chopped potatoes to the mix and stir to combine. Return heat to a medium-low setting and add seasoning salt, cumin, sea salt, black pepper, and chili powder. Toss to fully combine, and allow to cook for 15 minutes; stirring occasionally. In the meantime, in a small bowl mix together tomato paste and salsa. Set aside.
Pre-heat the oven to 400 Degrees F. After 15 minutes, add the tomato/salsa mixture and toss to fully coat all the potatoes. Continue to cook for 5 minutes. After 5 minutes, in a medium sized baking dish, transfer over potato mixture. Cover and transfer to the oven for 30 minutes, removing and stirring after 15 minutes, and allowing to cook uncovered for the last 5 minutes.


To assemble, place a generous amount of potatoes on a hot tortilla. Follow by a generous amount of cilantro, and a lime quarter to be served squeezed over the top.
Makes 8