Mr.Green once again fails to really impress me.
Directed By: Adam Green (Hatchet)
Welly, welly, well, look what the cat has dragged into Zombies DON’T Run today! It’s another film by every horror bloggers favorite director Adam (f’n) Green! Or Jesus Green as I like to call him. In all honesty, when Green isn’t launching a “Support Unrated Horror..ps go see MY movie” campaign, he’s just making average horror films that I don’t truly enjoy near as much as the most of you! But I’m ready to give the man a fair chance with Frozen! It can’t be half as underwhelming as Hatchet can it??…Can it?
Two life long friends, and one’s girlfriend that the other would have rather stayed home, take a nice little skiing trip! Once one of the friends thinks messing around with the girl wasted the day for he and his friend, they all decide to sweet talk the man working the lift into one last run just before it’s shut down for a coming storm (and for the week)! As you’d assume, the worst happens and all three get stuck out in the middle of the place with nothing but snow..and wolves.
Well, it’s what you’s expect from a movie of this nature and I won’t lie, I’ve seen a very similar story before. Honestly, it’s like a mix between two films I’ve already reviewed before, Frozen Kiss and Vertige. As a matter of fact, if the two had a baby you’d get Frozen. Taking the early heights play of Vertige and the element of the bitter cold in Frozen Kiss, with some wolves tossed in, pretty much sums up Froze, but I’ll give the movie a little bit of a break because it’s watchable..at least once.
I’ll give kudos to the characters of the movie because they go from being overly annoying to almost watchable when the shit hits the fan in the movie. By the time the movie ends, you kinda care about them, or at least you care about them enough to want to see them live. The dialogue of the film isn’t horrible, it’s kind of hit and miss overall, but I liked some of it, even when Green has them telling stories that seem to go nowhere, which I guess might be realistic because I have a friend that sometimes tells me long stories and I wait for a point and never get one. Maybe Green is also one of those people?
Maybe that’s the main trouble with Frozen at the end of the day. It’s an hour and a half of s story that goes on, tosses in nice shots of the scenery, and gives us a few “ouch!” moments, but it really seems to lack a real point at the end of the day. Sure it’s funny in spots, it’s a little gory here and there, but I don’t think it packed enough moments to make you squirm in your seat and I’m not sure why. It’s very character and dialogue driven, so one could assume the hit and miss I spoke of when it comes to the dialogue might have something to do with the average feeling you get once you’ve seen the movie.
Also one major problem with the film that I had was with the ending. This movie seems to keep things more or less realistic and then one character seems to get the biggest lucky break in the history of films at the end before we wrap up with what you’d expect a film like this to wrap up with. That being the case, I didn’t hate it. I just wasn’t really blown away. You may like watching it, but I bet you won’t want to watch it again anytime soon after.
Well I didn’t think Hatchet was as good as everyone else wanted to say it was (more like a remix of Friday the 13th but instead of a lake we had a swamp), and I would put this under that on my enjoyment list. So sorry to Mr.Green and all his brainwashed minions, we’re just dealing with average material here.
The Rating (5.5/10)