Land Shark (2017) (DVD REVIEW)

Land Shark (2017) (DVD REVIEW)

Land Shark (2017) (DVD REVIEW)

0 comments 📅06 August 2019, 08:46

Land Shark (2017) (DVD REVIEW)
Directed By: Mark Polonia
STARRING: Sarah French, Peter Baldo, Kathryn Sue Young
RATED: UR/REGION: O/WIDESCREEN/NUMBER OF DISCS: 1
AVAILABLE FROM Camp Motion Pictures

When Linda Regis, Director of Development at MALCO Oceanic Research, unravels a sinister plot to inject sharks with human DNA in the hope of creating a Super-Shark Super-Soldier, she becomes the target of a dangerous killer. Meanwhile, MALCO’s DNA enhanced sharks, having discovered a way to slip past security, are busy honing their newly enhanced killer instincts both in and out of the nearby beaches. It won’t be long before local law enforcement and wanna-be sunbathers follow the carnage to its inevitable source, and the inevitable outcome of this insanity: the monster of destruction, the human-shark hybrid LAND SHARK!

I’m a long time fan of The Polonia Brothers and Mark is still out here doing his thing, thus how we have this movie, Land Shark. Now, when you make as many movies as Mark Polonia you are bound to have a miss every now and then (because they can’t all be classics) and I’d call Land Shark a miss for sure. I knew going in that we’d have cheesy stuff. I knew ahead of time we’d have a bad looking shark and bad CGI. I knew stuff here would be “bad” and I was well okay with that fact going into it. But this movie makes the big mistake an indie can’t make, it’s just dull and bad. Not entertaining bad, just BAD-bad. This movie just doesn’t really hit the cord on the comedy or the so bad it’s a good area.

Besides for the eye candy on the screen from time to time you can look at, Land Shark manages to make Snow Shark even look like JAWS in comparison. And believe me when I tell you that THAT is very hard to do. The whole movie just creeps on by at a bad pace and feels very tossed together, even more so than you’d expect from a movie like this. I own “bad” Polonia movies. I’ve still been entertained by those same movies. But this is one that might just be down the alley for people who are either Polonia completist or just have to have every shark movie that they see.

Extras

– Commentary track with Mark Polonia and Associate Producer Matt Watts
– Photo Gallery
– Making of Land Shark

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